April 2013
1 post
Did you ever have the slightest hint that we would end up as a couple, and that we would be living together in our own place right now? I know your answer to that. I know that it never crossed your mind that you would end up cohabitating with me. I’m the twist in your story. You’re the one I’ve always wanted since the day I met you, although I had to keep my wishes and feelings...
March 2013
2 posts
5 tags
social issues
On the issue of marriage..
I know I’m ready. I know I’m financially stable. I know I’m of the right age. I know I have the woman I can see myself married to for the next 75 years. She’s right in front of me. Willing to fight for me. Willing to fight my battles with me. Willing to celebrate with me upon winning those battles.
I’m hesitant because of a couple of...
“If a writer falls in love with you, you can never die.”
– (via inscienso)
January 2013
1 post
This. Here. Now.
It might sound a little (or a lot) corny, but knowing that I’m in love with you was solidified even more by watching that movie tonight. (Not Mama) You know that last scene where they were kissing each other and looking at each other all happy? I thought to myself “that’s how I feel when I’m kissing you”. Like I want to smile endlessly and there’s no reason in the world whatsoever for me to be...
December 2012
0 posts
intermittently eternally
I need to have a keyboard that lights up for moments like this when I want to pour my soul out and words come out of my fingers uncontrollably, and she is asleep. I like it when she sleeps and she puts her arms around me in her sleep, as if she’s dreaming of me. Oh, and her slight twitches, I notice those too. See, she’s required to be a vampire because of her job, and I can totally...
November 2012
3 posts
Be Good
The problem is I’m still the same Jeri I used to be. Even bigger problem is she’s willing to put up with it. I can never be thankful enough for this blessing disguised as this beautiful creature.. Rather, I don’t think I know how to show the proper gratitude that this woman so often deserves. Gahhh. Will I ever change? I sure hope so. I want to keep this one. I want to make sure...
October 2012
1 post
September 1st, 2012 21:23
Homage.
I think I should revisit that night. I think I should look in hindsight. Why, why, why would you risk falling? Knowing there was an almost certain chance.. Of failing.
Repeatedly, repetitively, redundantly. Once more than the previous one, you show cruelty. She forgives, pardons easily, without penalty. You know she deserves to be treated like royalty, You’re the only one who...
September 2012
5 posts
Jetsetter
Here’s something to hopefully make your Monday a little bit more bearable.. Remember when you were asking me why I’m still in Las Vegas and not anywhere else in the world right now (because I have the capability to be anywhere I want to be)? I have figured out a more appropriate answer to that inquiry. It’s not about the work, I know that will come no matter where I go....
falling slowly
I find that it is not the grand gestures that this girl is making; it’s the little things like bringing me bagels at 8am even when she’s coming from work, that are making me fall in love slowly with this woman.
Terrified
I want to know why you want me, because I can’t seem to find a reason to want myself. You’re insane for getting mad at me for questioning whether or not you really like me. I have every right to ask. Because in your world, I never even really existed until a couple of weeks ago. I have all these fears in regards to your feelings towards me. Are they momentary? Are they fleeting? Are...
"Who needs sleep when we got love?"
Ironically, I’m fighting my eyes that are about to shut right now, listening to Jack Johnson. hahaha
Oops, I sidetracked. What was the point of this post again? Oh, the point was to stay awake long enough so I could greet her a happy birthday, even though she’s technically already 23 since she was born in the Philippines.
Why do I feel like I’m the one having a birthday today?...
i run for love
I must have a thing for having epiphanies during showers and outside runs. I came up with one during the latter this morning.
My running is, and always has been inspired by love. When I got brokenhearted, I used running as a metaphor to run away from the woman who broke my heart. I created a mental image of her at the starting line and ran as fast I could to get as far away from her as possible....
August 2012
3 posts
III
How crazy is it that even in my dreams, the story is always this:
-stolen kisses -accidental brushing of your chest against my shoulders -momentary interlocking of our fingers
I dream of you tonight, yet again.. but the story is always the same.
There’s that one girl, I can never quite get.
Watchhypnotic-on-my-heart:
If you’re having a bad day, watch this. Seriously, I couldn’t stop laughing.
This made my day! LOL
In Passing..
On an ages-old contraption I stand,
In these avenues, of this gold-filled land.
Is it mechanical, is it electric?
On how this beast works, could it be magic?
Along comes this other car,
Number 22, going the opposite direction.
This lovely human being standing right there,
Passing me by, taking just a fleeting moment.
We high-fived.
Is it mechanical? Is it electric?
That surge of power...
July 2012
6 posts
So it is..
I need some direction.. I need someone who will motivate me to get my life back on track. Med school, maybe? Or nurse practitioner?
The truth, Gillyne, is when I lost you, I lost my sense of purpose. I’m still actively telling myself that I knew what I wanted before I met you and I should just keep calm and carry on with pursuing my dreams.
Regressing, again. When am I going to stop...
June 2012
8 posts
“One day, you’ll meet a guy. & he’s gonna notice every little detail about...”
– Tony ‘Teddie’ Nguyen
Or girl. Hehe
Remember how much the white chocolate smiley pop made you smile?
Be brave, little girl.
I want to be bad. For once, I want to not care about the consequences of whatever I choose to do. I have been practicing self control for so long now, and every single second you make my feelings linger, it gets harder and harder to maintain that level of self control.
Sephora. You dragged me to one section of the store and (incidentally?) placed your hand on mine in a non-traditional fashion....
I don't know about you, but..
You have no idea how sexy you sound in your photography talk. Turns me on and makes my insides melt like ice in 100 degree weather. Heehee
“You are so busy being you that you have no idea how utterly unprecedented you are.”
Flirtation at its finest. Gah.
I wish I could. Express emotion without being chastised for it. For being too emotional. For being too unconventional.
So what if I steer clear from tradition and express my desire for you in a way that not everyone else has?
I wish I could use the word nuance in...
don't let it get to you.
I lied. I am jealous. Green with envy. I try not to let it get to me, that’s why I was able to say “no,I am not jealous”. Just felt the wind in my hands to remind myself that you’re here. With me. That we’re in the same atmosphere, we share the same wind, we breathe the same air.
Yet somehow, none of that is enough.
You’ve got me wrapped around your fingers..
May 2012
8 posts
Hate.. Is it too strong a word?
Have you ever wanted, no, needed someone so bad, but feel absolutely no reciprocity from them? That they could give a rat’s ass whether or not you say “good morning” to them any given day? That with or without your daily unfailing greeting, their day would still go on as scheduled, but without their simple and inane “hi”, yours would not?
TOOD
It’s the kind of thing where you don’t have to post any pictures or check in to places you go to to show everybody that you’re in each other’s company. Just knowing that fact between the two of you and that it’s enough, makes it all the more real.
Because i didn't have a pen..
I do notice your affinity towards chocolate covered almonds, among other things. I’m noticing so much just by watching you move, eat, breathe.
Moments. Life and its plethora of moments. We get so busy minding those moments that have a huge impact on our lives that we fail to notice those that have small, but gradually accumulating ones.
I notice. I notice how your hand subtly finds its way to my hips. How your eyes avoid mine when you catch me staring. Your body language screams “No, I cannot give you me as much as I would love...
3 liner
When we make any type of physical contact It feels like all my nerve endings are tingling.
It’s a crazy good feeling.
April 2012
7 posts
NAUSEATED
They only really mind you when you’ve moved on. Damn these vultures, feeding off of the happiness of others. So we’ll let them talk, we’ll give them something to ponder on. You might not have the slightest clue, but I think we could become something extraordinary. Who am I to judge you for what you believe in? If it were up to me, I’d listen to your dreams and idealism....
Constellations
Two rooms away. Twelve inches apart. Always keeping that level of distance, but never going too far. I am playing with fire. I am danger close to being burnt. Where did all this infinite energy come from Why am I fighting just to stay awake? With you. To be near you. To know every nook and cranny. Find out every little random detail. I want to know. ..and I’ve got all the time in the world...
Pyrotechnics
It’s been a while since I have enjoyed myself this much, without fear of disappointment and regret. Without hesitating to say anything stupid or hurtful.
Yes, I know I’m uncertain at this point, but I would rather have this feeling of happy uncertainty any day than have that feeling of utter worthlessness.
I am terrified. I am playing with fire, trying to start a war in my head. But...
and then it hit me..
Today, I had a realization. I have been in the company of such good people lately, people whom I’m lucky enough to be friends with. With these people, there are no pretensions. No expectations of anything other than friendship. I’ve realized that I no longer feel the need to be in a romantic relationship, that the company of these people have made me strong enough to be content with...
4 tags
Revisiting
”..and you realize that that person is the only person you’re supposed to kiss for the rest of your life. And for one moment you get this amazing gift. And you wanna laugh and you wanna cry, ‘cause you feel so lucky that you’ve found it, and so scared that it’ll go away all at the same time.”
I don’t know which stage of grief I am in right now. I thought I was already in the...
Meredith Grey did not fail me.
It’s a Grey’s Anatomy kind of night tonight. The last three weeks would have been hell for me if not for the company of my good friends and my omnipresent family. Grey’s has sympathized with me. I just found out that there hasn’t been a new episode that has aired since March 15, 2012. Thank you for not making me miss you, Grey’s. Even though you are beginning to...
March 2012
11 posts
You can skyrocket away from me, and find another galaxy far from me. Just leave me your stardust to remember you by.
i live to set you free..
That moment when you finally give in to your emotions and let everything go, all at once. Not forgetting a single memory, not omitting a single word, and not having a care in the world what everyone else thinks, even the person who caused you this. Let...
i wish i could give you a hug
Those eyes, they say it all. Masked beneath the superfluous beams of joy, hiding underneath the facade of ecstasy, is you, feeling more alone than you’ve ever been.
And make you feel my love. My unrequited, unequivocated, unparalleled love.
3 tags
